The Courage to Be Disliked.
The Courage to Be Disliked is a philosophical and psychological book written by Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga. The book is structured as a dialogue between a philosopher and a young man, where the philosopher teaches the young man about the principles of Adlerian psychology, which is a school of thought developed by Alfred Adler.
The central theme of the book is that true happiness and freedom come from taking full responsibility for your life and living in a way that aligns with your values, rather than seeking validation or approval from others. It challenges the common belief that our past experiences or the opinions of others define who we are. Instead, it emphasizes the idea that we are free to choose how we react to the world and that we can change our lives by changing our mindset.
Key ideas include:
- The Courage to Be Disliked: The book argues that it is important to have the courage to live authentically and be true to oneself, even if that means not being liked by others. It encourages letting go of the need for approval and the fear of judgment.
- Separation of Tasks: The book teaches the concept of separating one’s own tasks from the tasks of others. This means focusing on what you can control and not taking responsibility for the actions, thoughts, or feelings of others.
- Self-Acceptance: Adlerian psychology promotes the idea of accepting yourself as you are, without dwelling on past mistakes or seeking perfection. It encourages the importance of focusing on the present moment and taking responsibility for your future.
- Community Feeling: The book also introduces the concept of "community feeling," which refers to the sense of belonging and contributing to the well-being of others. It stresses that true happiness comes from the meaningful relationships we form and the ways we help others.
Ultimately, the book suggests that we have the power to change our lives by changing our thinking, and we should strive for self-acceptance and authentic living, free from the constraints of other people's judgments.
*The Courage to Be Disliked* explores the idea that true happiness comes from living authentically and not seeking approval from others. Through a dialogue between a philosopher and a young man, the book teaches key concepts from Adlerian psychology, including taking responsibility for your own life, separating tasks (focusing on what you can control), and embracing self-acceptance. It encourages readers to break free from the fear of being disliked and live in alignment with their values.